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Unread 01/20/2018, 09:46 PM   #10
Tom39
Registered Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Spotsylvania, Virginia
Posts: 435
Here is a quote by Maya Angelou that I think fits this situation -

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

― Maya Angelou

Keeping that in mind, there are a few things I consider before I hit send. I reflect on the things that I am trying to convey and how it might make a person feel. In order to do this in a forum setting, I consider the experience level of the person I am responding to. In this instance, the OP has relayed in their bio that they have been in the hobby for 6mo and have a 10g tank. This tells me that their experience level in the hobby is at ground 0 and I know from experience that this is not a great place to be in when something goes wrong.
So in a situations like this, I try and remember what it was like when I was new to the hobby, and I put myself in their shoes and try and understand that they are struggling and desperately wanting to make this work. I also remember and understand that their hope of a successful tank seems to be fading. This is evident by their request for help in post #1 and their statement of concern for a fish in post #3 &4. The encouraging part of this is that, this information tells me that they haven't given up that hope of the perfect tank. It also makes me hopeful that one day, they may be able to contribute positively, their experiences to someone else on this forum that is struggling just like they once were.

There is a time and place for the brutal truth but this is not one of them. Now is the time for discretion and damage control and not pointing fingers, identifying fault and placing blame.

Is the fire fish going to make it? I don't know. But is that what really matters in this situation?


__________________
150g cube, 40g sump, Rapid led, Neptune controller, LR, sandbed, ATS, PS

Current Tank Info: 150g Marineland Cube
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